Hungry Man Eats Block Of Cooking Chocolate Like It’s Real Chocolate

Friends of Lugarno man Victor Bostor are carefully monitoring his health after he revealed that he had eaten a block of cooking chocolate as a snack when he realised that there were no proper blocks of normal chocolate in his flat.

“Everyone knows that cooking chocolate is for cooking only and not to be eaten like proper chocolate but Victor just wolfed it all down like it was a family block of Cadbury’s Dairy Milk,” said horrified buddy Patrick Beige. “I don’t even know why he keeps the stuff in his kitchen, it’s easily mistaken for eating chocolate and I’ve never seen him make lamingtons or anything that might need it as an ingredient.”

“We don’t really know just how much cooking chocolate constitutes a lethal dose when consumed without first being incorporated into a black forest fudge cake or some kind of brownie,” said Dr Susan Reinhold of the Poisons Information Service. “If ingested you should call 000 and hope that the local ER has a stomach pump.”

Bostor reports that he has felt no ill effects outside of feeling a little hyper, and is now eyeing off the roll of cookie batter at the back of the fridge.

“I’ve always suspected that you could eat cooking chocolate and not die, even though it only costs about half as much as regular chocolate,” said the reckless midnight snacker. “It’s the dirty little secret that “Big Chocolate” don’t want you to know”.

Peter Green


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