Shire Woman Survives Travelling Backwards On Train

A shire woman is miraculously clinging to life after surviving a harrowing two station journey sitting backwards on a CityRail passenger train.

“I thought this is it I’m going to die,” related Lilli Pilli commuter Beth Sorensen about her ordeal that began when she boarded the carriage at Oatley and discovered that all of the forward facing seats were taken. “I had no choice but to take the last remaining seat even though it meant having to look into the eyes of my fellow passengers and submit my body to the stresses of backwards travel.”

Sorensen was carried all the way to Jannali before being able to release herself from the backwards facing seat when someone in one of the forward facing seats got off.

“Probably the only thing that saved her life was that all the other passengers were too busy checking their phones to look up and stare in her direction,” said Dr Siegfried Starker from the Institute Of Highly Strung Medicine. “I’d love to examine her internal organ structure to find out how her lungs were able to still draw in air and why her stomach wasn’t flung straight back up her throat by the forces she would have been subject to.”

CityRail reported that there have been 37 fatalities so far this year on their system as a result of people with delicate constitutions having to travel backwards in the train.

Peter Green
http://www.twitter.com/Greeny_Peter

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