Shire Man Builds Giant Clump Of Lego Out Of Lego

A shire man has constructed a huge clump of Lego made entirely out of Lego after 10,000 hours of tireless work in his garage.

“I’ve made this whole thing without any plans at all using over a million individual pieces of Lego,” said Jannali engineer Dwayne Hall as he proudly posed in front of his masterpiece. “It’s supposed to be a aeroplane but I could only find one of those wing shaped thingys in my Lego box so it morphed into a flying skyscraper on wheels with the top half of Darth Vader as the pilot.”

“I was expecting to find a boring arsed replica of the Taj Mahal or another god damned fully working model of a submarine so I was pleasantly surprised when Dwayne opened up his roller door and I saw this humungous shapeless mass of Lego,” said Lego company representative Hans Danishname. “Here’s a guy who finally gets the point of Lego. Namely, the construction of great tottering conglomerates of little plastic doodads.”

“My whole job consists of counting millions and millions of Lego bricks to confirm that some nutjob has constructed the worlds biggest model of David Bowie or something,” said slightly deranged Guinness Book Of World Records judge Pegeen Shamrock. “Every day I have to meet some dunce who’s built an entire house out of Lego. Good on you mate, you can do something that every six year old can do but on a slightly larger scale. Go build a real house out of real bricks if you really want to impress me.”

Dwayne Hall’s clump of Lego sadly broke into two pieces when he lifted it up to show his aunty.

Peter Green

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