NASA has reported that yet another attempt to launch nostalgia for the decade known as the 90s has fizzled out on the launch pad.
“It’s about time we all acknowledged that the years between 1990 and 1999 were just the least noteworthy of any in the history of popular culture,” said rocket scientist Gerald Grunge. “None of the films or TV shows we try to send out that are full of references to stuff from the 90s get enough grip on the memories of people to power them beyond the earth’s gravity.”
“Can anyone name a song from the 1990s other than those two or three Nirvana songs that get played over and over,” said Dr Jill Flannelette, professor of 1990s culture at the University of Seattle. “Even the guys who used to be in Soundgarden just stare at me blankly when I ask them to name one Soundgarden song.”
“The whole nostalgia industry is going through a tough time coming to terms with the fact that the generation of people born between 1974 and 1986 are the dullest generation in history,” said Brian Springfield, chief exhibit constructor at the Smithsonian Museum. “Our entire 1990s exhibit consists of the fussball table from Friends and Forrest Gump’s park bench. I think the whole popular culture revival industry would be better off we skipped straight from the 1980s to the 2000s and gave the whole 1990s a miss.”
NASA intends to fire off one more rocket in an attempt to get 1990s nostalgia up into orbit. The rocket will contain crates full of Cranberries and Blink 182 CDs as well as boxes of scrunchies and butterfly hair clips.