Lonely 1979 Amco Cup Looking Forward To Finally Getting a Friend In Cronulla Sharks Trophy Cabinet

The 1979 Amco Cup has spent the week in eager anticipation of finally getting a roommate after spending 37 years in solitary confinement in the Cronulla rugby league’s club trophy cabinet.

“My only companion at the moment is a dead daddy long legs spider and he isn’t really up for a chat,” said the jug eared trophy which still has a set of faded blue, black and white ribbons hanging forlornly off its handles. “I’m dying to hear some news from the outside world. Do they still make Brasso? What does the 2016 vintage of Cold Duck champagne feel like sloshing around inside you after a victory. Is the Don Lane Show still on TV? So many questions.”

“It can be quite a shock for a trophy to find itself having to share its cabinet after years of living alone,” said trophy psychologist Dr Werner Von Silverware. “We learnt a lot from how Terry Waite transitioned to living with extra hostages in Beirut during the 1990s. The 1979 Amco Cup will find it hard having its routines disrupted and having to share what little limelight it has been getting with a much more popular interloper.”

After years of getting no more than a passing glance from club patrons carrying chicken shnitty’s away from the bistro, the 1979 Amco Cup will have to adjust to getting peered at constantly and deal with hearing people say “what’s that other thing?” as they gaze in awe at the premiership trophy.

“You have to remember the last time the 1979 Amco Cup felt the touch of a human hand was when Greg Pierce held it aloft at Leichhardt Oval,” said Dr Von Silverware. “Hopefully the little statues of Norm Provan and Arthur Summons will be able to fill it in on what’s been happening in the world since 1979.”

Peter Green

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